the most reassuring and disturbing thing ever said to me

As you can read on my earlier post, a couple of weeks ago I ran the London marathon. On the way, I ran at times with a guy from my church who was also running for the same charity and was looking to do a similar time. The last I saw of him was at about mile 11 as unfortunately he didn't finish (he's done it 3 times previous so all was clearly not well).

However, at this point he said something to me that got me reflecting . The conversation went something like:

Joe: How old are you?
Chris: 26.
Joe: 26...that's a great age.
Chris: (puffing too much to respond)
Joe: Mate, I reckon you've done it just right. You got married young, to a beautiful woman, you got a good education, you've travelled and experienced other cultures, and soon you'll be heading home to settle with your family and friends. [And here's the bit that got me] Everything from here on in is a bonus.

This is obviously a very complimentary thing to say, like I've managed my life well and had that much coveted thing called "luck" in my life. But it's also profoundly disturbing for two reasons:

1) The concept of "don't wish for a rough ride if things are going well, it will happen anyway". It's something I hear all the time in one way, shape or form. It's almost a case of "watch out, you're about to get knocked off the pedestal of life". I guess when you're flying, there's only one way to fall. So I 'm waiting on that a bit.

2) One thing I remember reading and mulling over time and time again is Jesus parable of the talents. Feel free to pick up a bible or type "parable of talents" into google and have a read, but the line that has always stuck out to me is "to those whom much is given, much is also expected". Joe's comment was like a blairing loudspeaker in my ear confirming what I'd feared, I've been given much! Doesn't take a rocket scientist then to work out my next thought.

I've always felt from God that much is "expected" of me. By "expected" I don't mean a certain bar I have to clear, but more a "hope" for what I can be and model for him. I don't know what that means really but I've been given so much: an incredible family, an amazing wife, good jobs with good pay, travelling opportunities...and the list goes on and on.

Of course, the only reason I could find all this disturbing is if I feel there's a gap between the responsibilities I've been given, and what I'm reaching for. And I'll admit, despite Joe's comment being one of the nicest things ever said to me, it has disturbed me. Not in a bad way, more in the way you disturb sand on the bottom of the sea to once again reveal what lies beneath. So thanks Joe.