the most reassuring and disturbing thing ever said to me

As you can read on my earlier post, a couple of weeks ago I ran the London marathon. On the way, I ran at times with a guy from my church who was also running for the same charity and was looking to do a similar time. The last I saw of him was at about mile 11 as unfortunately he didn't finish (he's done it 3 times previous so all was clearly not well).

However, at this point he said something to me that got me reflecting . The conversation went something like:

Joe: How old are you?
Chris: 26.
Joe: 26...that's a great age.
Chris: (puffing too much to respond)
Joe: Mate, I reckon you've done it just right. You got married young, to a beautiful woman, you got a good education, you've travelled and experienced other cultures, and soon you'll be heading home to settle with your family and friends. [And here's the bit that got me] Everything from here on in is a bonus.

This is obviously a very complimentary thing to say, like I've managed my life well and had that much coveted thing called "luck" in my life. But it's also profoundly disturbing for two reasons:

1) The concept of "don't wish for a rough ride if things are going well, it will happen anyway". It's something I hear all the time in one way, shape or form. It's almost a case of "watch out, you're about to get knocked off the pedestal of life". I guess when you're flying, there's only one way to fall. So I 'm waiting on that a bit.

2) One thing I remember reading and mulling over time and time again is Jesus parable of the talents. Feel free to pick up a bible or type "parable of talents" into google and have a read, but the line that has always stuck out to me is "to those whom much is given, much is also expected". Joe's comment was like a blairing loudspeaker in my ear confirming what I'd feared, I've been given much! Doesn't take a rocket scientist then to work out my next thought.

I've always felt from God that much is "expected" of me. By "expected" I don't mean a certain bar I have to clear, but more a "hope" for what I can be and model for him. I don't know what that means really but I've been given so much: an incredible family, an amazing wife, good jobs with good pay, travelling opportunities...and the list goes on and on.

Of course, the only reason I could find all this disturbing is if I feel there's a gap between the responsibilities I've been given, and what I'm reaching for. And I'll admit, despite Joe's comment being one of the nicest things ever said to me, it has disturbed me. Not in a bad way, more in the way you disturb sand on the bottom of the sea to once again reveal what lies beneath. So thanks Joe.

Why oh why...take 2

So post 1 was devoted to "why oh why do we blog". Post 2 is to be devoted to something 33,999 other people can related to right now: why oh why do we do marathons? On Sunday I did the London marathon. I trained pretty hard and ran better than I expected. But I'm in agony now. So why did I do it?

And the answer to this is that I'm not really sure. I think people do it for different reasons. I read the other day that the average age of the competitors was 41. 41! Just the age where you'd think people were settling into middle-age, struggling to pay school fees and dealing with their renegade children and most likely evaluating their work-life as well as home-life. Surely life is tough enough? So where's the logic to run?

For me (as a spritely 26 year-old) it was all about the challenge. The process went something like this:
1. My wife works for a charity. One of the girls she works with had put her name down to do it, and decided she didn't want to. She therefore asked my wife if she knew anyone who'd want to do it.
2. My wife said "Chris might"
3. She suggested it to me and I told her I'd train for 2 weeks. At that point I'd evaluate 1. how my body was going and 2. how my commitment was going
4. 2 weeks on I'd been training and figured I'd started the challenge so I couldn't very well stop
5. Turned up on start line thinking "it can't be that bad"
6. Spent the following 26.2 miles later realising "it can be that bad"

So I'm not sure that's an inspiring story for anyone. But that's how I fell in. Was it worth it? My answer now is yes. My answer at mile 23 the other day was not so resounding. Would I do it again? No. However, a little voice has started up in the back of my mind telling me there's a difference between someone who's run a marathon and a marathon runner.

Again, the prospect of a challenge presents itself...

why oh why?

I find the concept of the blog slightly self indulgent and reasonably confident (read: arrogant) in a sense. I'm expecting/hoping that you want to read what I have to say. Like what I have to say is important enough for you to alt-tab from FoxSports/The Age/The Guardian and read my words. Well, this isn't about that. This is a result of two things:

1. I like to write.
2. I like to observe/critique the little things and the big things of life, from weird smells on the tube to Middle East peace process.

That's all for post 1. I'll try and post regularly but you know what they say about the best laid plans...