skills

I watched Napoleon Dynamite again the other night. I have to share some of the funnier quotes from this low-budget, low-brow but very funny, simple movie. If nothing else, you can walk away saying you saw a movie with no swearing, no sex and no violence (unless you count throwing a steak at someone violence). That in itself makes this film rare.

Napoleon Dynamite: Stay home and eat all the freakin' chips, Kip.
Kip: Napoleon, don't be jealous that I've been chatting online with babes all day. Besides, we both know that I'm training to be a cage fighter.

Don: Hey, Napoleon. What did you do last summer again?
Napoleon Dynamite: I told you! I spent it with my uncle in Alaska hunting wolverines!
Don: Did you shoot any?
Napoleon Dynamite: Yes, like 50 of 'em! They kept trying to attack my cousins, what the heck would you do in a situation like that?

Napoleon Dynamite: Well, I have all your equipment in my locker. You should probably come get it cause I can't fit my numchucks in there anymore.

Napoleon Dynamite: [referring to Deb's milk] I see you're drinking 1%. Is that 'cause you think you're fat? 'Cause you're not. You could be drinking whole if you wanted to.

Pedro: Do you think people will vote for me?
Napoleon Dynamite: Heck yes! I'd vote for you.
Pedro: Like what are my skills?
Napoleon Dynamite: Well, you have a sweet bike. And you're really good at hooking up with chicks. Plus you're like the only guy at school who has a mustache.

Deb: What are you drawing?
Napoleon Dynamite: A liger.
Deb: What's a liger?
Napoleon Dynamite: It's pretty much my favorite animal. It's like a lion and a tiger mixed... bred for its skills in magic.

Napoleon Dynamite – Well, nobody’s going to go out with me!
Pedro – Have you asked anybody yet?
Napoleon Dynamite – No, but who would? I don’t even have any good skills.
Pedro – What do you mean?
Napoleon Dynamite – You know, like numchuck skills, bow hunting skills, computer hacking skills. Girls only want boyfriends who have great skills.

Classic humour!